Since there is no real comfortable way to describe this story, I will do my best to use vanilla language and allow Adam Jones to describe the rest.
Early in the third quarter of the Cowboys' 28-10 victory against the Browns on Sunday, Jones fielded a punt at his own 14-yard line. He muffed the catch, and in the ensuing scrum Browns defensive back Nick Sorensen ...
"Dude grabbed my [expletive]," Jones said Monday. "I told that dude, 'You're lucky I'm trying to do better because I would have got 15 (yards) for kickin' your [expletive]. He grabbed them and squeezed them. ... If you want somebody to let the ball go, grab their [expletive]. I'll sure let go after that."
It is my sincere hope that this is the last of these such stories I ever, ever write.
- Mac Engel